Possession

"I cannot let you burn me up, 

nor can I resist you . . . 

No mere human can stand in a fire and 

not be consumed"

Possession

I watched the movie Possession for the first time last night.  

(This is the one starring Gwyneth Paltrow)

It is a beautiful story about an inconvenient romance.

It is complicated, secret, and opposed by culture

but it produces beautiful results.

I LOVE stories like this.

I deeply  believe that all relationships do not have to follow a cookie cutter format for the people in them to experience true romance.  

Sometimes, not being able to be together at all creates a type of romantic passion that would not exist under other circumstances.

I highly recommend this movie if you like Victorian England, poetry, tortured romance, and/or Gwyneth and Aaron Eckhart.  

Another AMAZING movie along these same lines is "Dangerous Beauty"

One of my favorite movies of all time, I highly recommend it!!!!!

Do you have any tortured romance-type movies to recommend to me????

Love, 

Ambria Monique

My life is FUN!!!

Sometimes, in the craziness of life and law school and all the obligations I face, I forget to acknowledge the fact that my life OVERFLOWS with FUN!!!

* These photos are from a great little night last week where I took a couple of unplanned hours and met my dear friend Molly to watch a classmate play open mic at Blue Moose

(Some extremely fun, flirty texting was involved!!!)

Recently, I got to go to DC with my bestie and her boyfriend and we went to see her bro's band, Loose Lips

(Love them!!!)

This past weekend was epic, but I forgot to take pics!!!  There was a law school party, dancing at 123, the King's Speech, many brunches, hours spent at Barnes and Noble, and a Super Bowl Party!!!

Today, I helped my class sell nachos (which was fun!), had class 2 - 3:15, a job interview at 3:20, and class 3:30 to 7:30.  It has been a CRAZY day!  Right now I am finishing up my 4 hour class and looking forward to a more relaxed schedule the next couple of days!

I did something tonight that I never do . . .

I RAN!

I, Ambria Adkins, a not a runner.  But I did it.

And I am proud. 

(I love this quote, and this movie!)

When I got home, I did a few exercises with hand weights and then some yoga poses that felt super great!!!

My body feels so good right now, I am inspired for tomorrow!

Honest Talk About Weight Loss

Fridays are my weigh-in day.  

After 9 days on Weight Watchers, I had lost 3.5 lbs, which I am happy with because healthy results are 1-2 lbs a week lost.

I did some calculations, and if I stay on the program, and keep up with the 2 lbs a week rate, I should be at my ideal weight by June, which is when I am going to Korea for a summer study abroad trip :)

(I am extra-inspired to lose weight before going to Korea because I do not want to be known as the "fat American"!!)

Now for some honest talk: I have had another break-through.

I have been making progress and felt good about my progress.

However, today was terrible!!!!!!!

I am on a weekend getaway with some law school friends, and today I totally binged on food. 

I thought to myself "I am on vacation, I can have a cheat day!"

But here is where the break-through comes in:

I feel so miserable now, and all I can think is

 "No food is worth this feeling!!"

I literally feel like I am waddling every time I move.

I feel like I am going to blow up.  

After 9 days on watching portions, eating feeling food, and feeling good, this is terrible!!!!!

And so, I am even more inspired to stay on my program.  The couple of minutes  of pleasure I feel when I am eating crappy, large amounts of food is vastly outweighed by the terrible, uncomfortable, bloated feeling I am feeling now!!!!

Weight Watchers

In my last post, I talked about my struggle to lose weight and the changes I want to make in this new year!

The way I have decided to do that is by using Weight Watchers Online.  

I decided to do the online program because my schedule is hectic and I didn't want to add meetings to it and as a student, I am always on my computer anyway.  

I have been trying many of the Smart Ones frozen meals. 

I am almost always pleasantly surprised by how good these meals taste!!!  

They honestly do not taste like diet food!  I think the thing that makes them helpful for me is the predetermined portions.  The food tastes good and I enjoy it, but when it is gone, it is gone and I can't keep over-eating. 

As an avid breakfast lover, my favorite Smart One meal is the Morning Express meal with eggs, potatoes, cheese and ham.  

It is delicious!!!

There are also AMAZING deserts that are 3 points each!  The Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Sundae is the best treat on earth!!!

New Year . . . New Me

Every year, during the month of January, everyone talks about change.

It is a cliche, and often the "changes" are done, and old habits have resumed before the month even ends.

That is why I cringe at even writing this post.

However, for awhile now, something has been very unsettled in my soul:

I am not Happy with Me. 

Now, that does not mean I don't like anything about myself.

Quite the contrary, as I do like most things about me.

Things I like:

My eyes,

My hair,

The fact that I am never afraid to speak my opinion, 

My obnoxious laugh and loud voice, 

My smile, 

The fact I am tough enough to be in law school, 

etc.

And I love my friends more than anything, and they like me,

so clearly I am not half bad.  

But there is one thing that I LOATHE about myself, 

and that is my body.

(it was hard for me to find pictures as examples, because I try to take as many "face only" pics as possible)

This is really hard for me to say that and put it out there.  

It seems too negative and I have always thought that if I don't draw attention

to my weight and body problems, then no one will notice

(Yeah, right!! Get your head out of the sand!)

I am forcing myself to be extremely honest and real in this blog post, because once

I have put this out there, I can't take it back.

I have to do something about it.

And I have come to that point that I have often heard you must come to before real change occurs:

I CANNOT GO ON DOING WHAT I HAVE BEEN DOING AND BE HAPPY AT THE SAME TIME.

My only option now is change.  

I do have a plan, and I will write further blog posts in the coming days detailing my plan

(part of the plan is to blog the experience, for acountability!)

Another Rant . . .

So, I am watching E! News and I just saw the most ridiculous thing and immediately thought

"I must write about this!"

First, Kanye West was on talking about his new album.

He talked about taking a year off and his new album which he is really proud of. 

He even has a song that includes vocals by Rihanna, Elton John, Alicia Keyes and John Legend.

The story talked about how he had spent the last year apologizing for the Taylor Swift debacle

and when asked about it, 

He was very honest and talked about how

he made a mistake even though he meant it with good intentions and people have reacted to him like he killed someone.  I giggled to myself because I thought "He is dead on, the media treated him like he killed someone!!! Yes, he was rude and thoughtless, but in all reality it was not THAT big of a deal."

THEN THE NEXT STORY CAME!!!!!!

The VERY NEXT STORY was about how in the wake of Charlie Sheen's latest situation with the hookers and cocaine and trashed hotel room, his fans still have not turned on him.

SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?!?!??!

Kanye interrupts an award speech and has to take a year off and try to rebuild his image.

Charlie Sheen has repeatedly been caught with hookers and drugs

and he will not lose a day of work, UNLESS he is in prison!!!!!

I THINK THIS IS INSANE!!!!!!

What is the weird hold Charlie Sheen has over America??????

HE IS A LOSER!!!!!  

At least Kanye does not have 4 children that are affected by all of his actions!

If I had to choose, I would choose Kanye over Charlie Sheen any day!!!

Any that is my rant!

Love, 

Ambria Monique